All They Had To Do Was Cancel
When you’re tempted to back out, use common sense and decency. Don’t put off canceling until the last minute. Plans with a friend or back out of a commitment. Communicate as soon as you realize you can’t (or don’t want to) follow through. Apologizing and telling the truth will go a long way. You are not required to make up an elaborate excuse. “I stretched myself too thin, and I’m not going to make it,” is adequate.” I’m so sorry,” you might say.
Although the person may be disappointed, they are unlikely to be deeply hurt or insulted because you spoke up tactfully. Recognize that each of us has unique social and emotional needs. When communicating with others, it is perfectly acceptable to express personality differences. If you say something like, “You know what? I’m sorry for missing the party, but I underestimated what I might need this weekend, and I’d like to take some time for myself and hang low tonight,” people will understand.