Fix Your Own Bike
At first, we thought this was another razor-based business card, but upon further investigation, we found that this is actually a ruler and a wrench. Do you see the hexagonal hole in the bottom right of this metal card? You can use that to tighten or loosen the bolts on your bike.
As for the other holes, you’ll have to consult Terry Miller, the bike tech at Broke Bike Alley, because we have no idea. As for the ruler, you can use it to measure things up to three inches in length. We know for a lot of men out there, three inches is too much. Zing!